Sunday, May 15, 2005

Surrender

Don't worry, its way hard for me to forget about blogging. I'm always here in the end...

Three more days of classes. Again I marvel at how fast time is passing. I only have 41 minutes of juice on my computer battery. I didn't eat dinner because I wasn't hungry, but now my stomach kind of aches, though for some reason its kind of ached like that all afternoon. As if I was anticipating something that is going to happen, but I don't know what it is.

I've been in my room the entire weekend being in the best mood i've been in awhile. I just went downstairs and its pouring, lightening for one of the first times in a few months. I'm usually terrified of opening my blinds, but tonight's an exception.

I've listened to Spoon so much its continuously in my head.

I'm so off in my own world I don't even really feel like blogging. I'm sitting on my bed in anticipation of something, and I still don't know what it is. Nothing happened but i'm sitting here in the dark grinning like an idiot. Maybe it was the nice phone calls I had this weekend, or the IM conversations where suddenly people aren't scared to say what they're feeling. Maybe its that soccer's over and i'm to lazy to think about anything except my research paper anymore. I've had a lot of time in my room this weekend, and I learned a lot more about myself then I was expecting.

Ten minutes just went by as I wrote the last sentence. What the fuck is wrong with me.

Wednesday after third period Molli and Henry paid me the highest compliments. I mentioned this, my blog while Adam was getting ready to leave. Henry asked Adam if he had read it, Adam replied no. Suddenly Henry and Molli, who's sitting on the couch doodling in my graph paper notebook are gushing about my blog to Adam. I'm leaning against the table grinning and turning bright red. "You have to read it! Its Brilliant! Shes amazing, Adam you HAVE to read it." Adam looks at them then at me. "I'd like that Rebecca would you mind?" I shrugged. I couldn't stop my mom, I say. Molli writes down the address and tries to press it on Adam who gives her this look and says, Rebecca'll give it to me when she's ready. And he smiles at me and leaves.

I couldn't stop smiling through out my entire math test. So I'm going to give him the address on the last page of my research paper. As a little note, just in case he actually really does want to read it.

Molli's not talking to me because at the soccer game on Fri. Sam and Nate came over to the bench and I hung out with them.

It was actually a lot of fun because they were being really cool, and we were eating Joe's star bursts because he was giving them to us, and I was sticking the wrappers down Sam's shirt until he got mad, and Grace was talking about how Nate wasn't hot and i was disagreed completely. Then at the end of the game when we lost and Grace and I are the only ones not crying she turns to me and says, "I love how we don't have to feel guilty because we didn't play." I look at her, "Hells yeah." The bus ride home we spat sunflower seeds in Dave's lap and pestered him to tell us about the gossip. So everyone forgot about the shitty game really quickly.

Then that night Matt called me which was nice...

And the next morning I got online and only Nate was on and I got to tell him about my really weird dream which was fun because he was in it. And then I surrendered myself to the computer screen and spoon.

I think i'm ganna go

5 Comments:

Blogger maxine said...

that game was actually kind of fun. except that we lost and all. what is grace thinking? you know what i mean...thats how sad my life has gotten.

12:03 AM  
Blogger joe said...

COMMENT. i know your glad i went to that game! i make everything great dont i. cept no!

8:39 PM  
Blogger Maddie said...

They're right, you know. You have an awesome blog.

9:30 PM  
Blogger joe said...

u havent posted in along time...wats up with that!!?!?!!?!!?

7:40 PM  
Blogger Rebecca said...

i'm going... i'm going... :)

8:24 PM  

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